KICK TITO! Go back to Walmart, Lilac!
Not all celebrities are good people. Kwame the sock monkey found that out in October 2001 when he was shopping at a Walmart in Cerritos, California. Kwame is a big video game fan, and was picking up a copy of his favorite game, Metal Gear Solid 2. It was the last copy in the store - Kwame had waited 10 months to buy and play this game.

A large oaf with no hair took the game from him. There was a brief shuffle, and Kwame was overpowered by the ogre.


Kwame went home, and did his research. He found the monster's picture, and it came with a name: Tito Ortiz. An exact match, Kwame had found his nemisis.


The plan came to him instantly. Begin a terrible and malicious grassroots campaign to defame and wound Tito. Kwame's revenge would be thorough and complete - starting online and then a planned attack at the next UFC event.


He began to scour the Internet. Revenge by Internet.


The KICK TITO website is born. Brilliant, Kwame says.


AHAHAHAHAHA! Me big sock monkey! Me famus!

NEXT: Kwame changes his life to get in shape for the big Kick.



KWAME NO READ EMAIL LILAC!